Trauma Cat “Prepare to Apologize”

SAMMY's Best New Artist Releases Album

Prepare to Apologize art by @tuesday_addams

If you caught the SAMMY Awards Show you heard Trauma Cat’s memorable acceptance speech in receipt of the Brian Bourke Award for Best New Artist. If not, hit that link. The band has a truly unique advertising strategy. The members (you may or may not recognize) go by aliases. If you search the internet you will find out that “Trauma Cat are an independent power trio based in the post-industrial hellscape of Syracuse, New York, USA, comprising Ralph Kojig (guitar and vocals), Roman Pando (bass and vocals), and Rutger DiBoyere (drums). Though critics speculate on the band’s true origin and the meaning of their existence, Trauma Cat are widely credited as the founders of “cuck rock,” an indeterminate school of music indebted to incessant apology and shameless cross-genre appropriation. Others have described Trauma Cat’s sound as “uncomfortable art rock,” and their politics as “alt-wrong.”

Prepare to Apologize recently became available on all streaming services after the band had released a couple singles last year. Ralph Kojig said, “This album is trash and I’m deeply embarrassed that it’s out in the world. Unfortunately, I possess neither the free will nor the resources to reverse this horrific process. I am a mere observer of my own self-made apocalypse. Someone please make it stop. I’m so sorry.”

Roman Pando said, “It all happened so fast—this band, the album, everything. I can’t help but assume we’ve given the general public some serious emotional whiplash, and for that, we’d like to apologize, and apologize again. Is apology enough, though? It’s hard to say. Sorry.” Rutger DiBoyere is a mute, and has no comment. Roman Pando also said, “Now that the damage is done, we feel it is a fitting punishment to promote the record profusely. Slop begets slop, as they say, and now we must endure the hell that is ‘the album cycle.’ And unfortunately, we have plenty more content coming down the pike. Music is a relentless mistress to whom I suspect we’ll be utterly cucked for the foreseeable future. I’m so incredibly sorry.” For more information, please visit the LEARN section of our website, traumacat.com. Ralph adds, re: Rutger… “Rutger would like to invoke his fifth amendment right under the Constitution of the United States.”

 

I took a listen to the album while on my neighborhood walk. The self titled song, Trauma Cat, reminiscent of an 80s cartoon rock band theme song, transported me to an electric scooter ride through an intergalactic space portal. The seductive lyrics in CTRL/CMND pulled me in with “give your mind to me.” This song is my pick and is going on my personal playlist. Fire in the Jail got in my head too. It has a 311 type rhythm that makes an appearance before a trippy bridge and intense ending ensue. This would be my choice for radio play. “They been telling me since I was a child to get with the program…I don’t care if everyone believes it. It don’t make it true.” In a world where politics finds it’s way into every aspect of life it can be hard to walk away even if you don’t want to play the game.” We throw a little dice down but the dealer’s already won.” It made me wonder when everything can be manipulated is this world a jail?  For all of the band’s antics there are some very deep ideas in this album.

 

About Misse Fedele 265 Articles
Photographer, Promoter, Contributor

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